How I Spent My Memorial Day Long Weekend

Being on the 'No Life Shift', I cherish my time off and was especially looking forward to maybe having three days away from The Mag Plant From Hell. I never know if I'm working the weekend until the last minute on Friday and I no longer make plans. On Wednesday however when the O.T. is posted, only one cell was running and one assembly station, so having three days off was a sure thing. On Friday, they, the powers that be, added four more machines and two more assembly areas to work on Saturday. Now I haven't had to work a weekend or even one day of a weekend in some time, because someone else was always nailed. But with the added machines, I knew that I would be called upon to 'move the dashboards', it was just meant to be. All afternoon Friday, I stayed clear of the supervisor. On a couple of occasions I could see him glancing at me out of the corner of my eye and immediately headed in the other direction. At 10:50 p.m. and not yet having been approached, I headed to the Shipping Office and hid in their bathroom (baff-room if you live in the inner city or can't speak the King's English). Not a very professional thing to do, but hey, I'm not a professional kind of guy. I washed up and was swiping my time card at precisely 11:00 p.m. Eastern Standard Time and I was GONE and looking forward to three days of relaxation.

Saturday it rained and you know, it didn't bother to me. I was so tired from dodging my boss all night Friday, that I was totally exhausted and just kicked back the entire day, napping, eating and napping. And you know what? Deb didn't give me any shiiiiiit because she was doing the exact same thing. I thought we were going to go out with Joe and Mona for dinner, but apparently they were still busy hauling furniture for Cat. So Deb made a garlic noodle and crab with a 'K' dish and we stayed home and rested some more. Doing nothing for some reason really tired me out.

Sunday, I awoke around 1100 hours and kicked on my favorite TV channel next to Starz, The Golf Channel and ESPN, and watched a landscaping show. Deb was heading over to Jennifer's and they were going out to pick up some material to make curtains, so I decided to go out and start power washing the upper deck. What a mistake that was. It took me almost 6 hours of non-stop work to finish up. Either I'm really particular about my deck or it was really dirty with flying dirt particles from the corn field next to and behind me. Deb came home with lunch and it was back to the deck. After a shopping trip to Charlotte later that evening and dinner, we headed home to watch a movie.

MONDAY - MY LAST DAY OF REST AND RELAXATION. After all, I am a veteran and today is my day, but it was not to be. I thought since it was suppose to be a nice day out, that I'd call up my good buddy Joe and see if he wanted to go out and play a quick nine, but it was not to be. Before I could even tell her my plans for the day, I was informed that the sun was shinning, the dew on the lawn would be gone by the time we returned from the Flower Garden and ready for me to get on my mower and ride. I turned around to see if someone were behind me, because I knew she sure the hell wasn't talking to me. After a trip to the flower shop, gas station and then Felpausch for some steaks for me to grill later, we were back home and my last day of relaxation was over. I had three days of work to do in one. While Deb planted flowers, I mowed, weed whipped, edged 110' of driveway (actually 220' because I had to go back the other way), planted 28 tomato plants, cleaned out the shed and power washed some of my stuff, she finally said "I turned the oven on for some pasty's for lunch. When lunch is ready, bring mine up to me, I'll be in our bedroom resting." After lunch and a little nap, it was right back out there to throw some wood chips around. We finished up in time to take a shower, throw the steaks on the grill, eat and think about going to bed. Both Deb and I worked really hard today, but I heard her say as she headed up stairs "Don't worry about cleaning up the dinner dishes, you can do it tomorrow before you go to work." So how am I finishing up my three days off? I'm in the dungeon watching 'Jaw's II' of a 'Jaws' marathon and eating watermelon.

Memorial Day-ingly,

J.E.

How To Spot An Eaton Rapids Hunter With a DUI

Wassup? To the four people that read this shiiiiiiit. I was thinking last year during hunting season, that when I was a kid growing up in Detroit during that time of year, not that many years ago, you'd see tons of cars with dead deer strapped to the roof. I haven't seen that as much since leaving the DDDDDDD-troit area 35 years ago. Being young, I was amazed when someone would stop next to my Dad's car with a carcass lashed to it and it's head flipping from side to side on the drivers windshield. Maybe it wasn't as stylish back then to own a pick-up as it is today and just throw the damn thing in the back.

Living here in good ole Eaton Rapids, I don't think I've ever seen anyone driving up or down Main Street with a deer anywhere in sight. Maybe E.R. people don't hunt. Then I started to wonder how a person that was unfortunate enough to have his license suspended for having indulged in one to many, in a one horse, can't do a damn thing, town and also hunted, would get his or her 'kill' back to their digs.

Well, that question was answered to me soon afterwards, when I spotted one of E.R.'s unfortunate residents who bagged his Bambi on opening day, pedaling his ass down Main Street just after leaving Abies Bar. Gotta love this Ho Dunk town. Nothing stops a man on Opening Day or when the golf courses open up.

Just Some Thoughts and a little somethng for 'The House Of Chin'

With the weather getting warmer, I'm finding that my Blogging time is somewhat limited due all of the outdoor things I enjoying doing. I find myself more interested in heading outdoors to do yard work, working on a new water feature I'm designing, refinishing my bench or just kicking back on my deck until I have to leave and work the No Life Shift at the Mag Plant, which really puts a damper on the things I much rather be doing. I guess I could sum this all up in just four words - I'd rather be golfing. A bad day of golf is better than a good day at the Mag Plant.

Today when I awoke, the sun was shinning and nice breeze was coming through the windows. I dressed and headed outdoors. I got as far as the upper deck and all of a sudden the sun was gone and the black clouds started to appeared. As I headed down towards the horseshoe pits, a huge drop of rain or bird dropping, I'm not sure which, struck me on the top of my head and I was back in the house like stink on shiiiiiiiiiit. "What to do now?" I thought. I've already cleaned the house so my lovely wife could just concentrate on grading papers, so what was there left for me to do but Blog.

During these wicked times of random terrorist attacks on our great land, sky rocketing gas prices and just the everyday B.S. that we encounter, I thought how important my family is to me and the love that we share. Jennifer and Eddie's upcoming wedding, Stephanie coming up with some scheme to get me over to her house to do some chores, and promising me dinner and her famous Strawberry Cake as payment and all the things that we have to look forward to. I don't see my children as much as I'd like, but they are all grown up with things to do themselves. Then I thought of my in-laws, Steve and Stacey and their girls, Tori & Jamie, of Becky and Rick, along with Molly and Kellen. All of them doing well and enjoying life. I thought of the good times we all have when we're together. Even my younger brother in law Scott came to mind and I wondered how he was doing in Austin, TX., so far away from his family and thought of the good times that we had with him when he was back in Michigan

I then thought of Joe and Mona (author of Welcome to the Nuthouse) and how their son Joey just moved back home from Kansas to be closer to his family. And Cathy and her son Tate, returning home to Michigan, because her husband, Maj. Paul, was being deployed next month. And then it hit me, like an epiphany of sorts. Since the Chin's are used to having a house full of people at any given time and I'm Not, I'm sure that they wouldn't hesitate and jump at the chance to have Scotty Russell move in with them. Think of all the possibilities this could bring. He could be a companion for Joey. Help Cathy out by babysitting Tate. Help Mikey with his music and take Mike's band to the top of the charts. Hell, with Scott's help, they could be on the cover of the next Rolling Stone. And, I'm sure that Scott would be so appreciative that he had three hots and a cot, he wouldn't mind bringing Mikey, Andy and Joey into his Auto Care Card business and they could all make money during the summer selling his fraudulent cards. You know, I'm so sure that Mona and Joe will go for this, I'm just going to email Scotty Russell and make all the arrangements for his return. I'm soooooo happy for them all.

Thanks guys.

"What's for dinner and where's your computer?"