It all started in early March, when the first of many emails started to arrive in my In Box, talking about an April golf outing around my neck of the woods. After hundreds of 'Bring yo cash, I'm kick'n yo ass' emails, it was decided that April 5th would be the designated date to kick off what we hoped would be the first of many fun times together. The weather didn't do us wrong either for the first 2008 Parkman Brothers (minus 1) Golf Outing. I arrived early so I could sneak on the putting green before the others arrived and get in a little warm up to increase my odds. But, as I was chipping 30' wedge shots onto the 5th green at Country Town Golf Course, a Mercury SUV pulled up and I heard, "You can do that all day, but I'm still taking yo cash, Bitch." CAUGHT! After we greeted each other with our traditional hand shakes and Manly Hugs, we headed to the Club House to pick up some 'Course Refreshment' and headed in the direction of the first tee. Even before getting there, the laughter and the insults had already begun. The Boys were in town and ready to play. Winter was officially over as far as we were concerned. The Parkman Brothers were together once again. At that moment, it seemed like we had all traveled back in time, back to being 12 years old in Detroit, when we all got off a bus at Rouge Park Golf Course, carrying a bag of mis-matched clubs for our first official golf lesson. Who knew then, that after that first encounter on a REAL golf course, we'd all still be best buds and playing this silly ass game 48 years later.
As all golfers know, the first tee is the worst because everyone is watching you tee off. You know that if you don't hit a somewhat decent first drive, everyone that is standing there is going to hoot on you big time. I can't remember who teed off first, but by the end of all of our first drives, two balls went left, with one landing on wrong fairway and the other one landing on the wrong green 75 yards to the left. One ball did fly straight and true, but only with a total distance of maybe 50 feet and stopped. The fourth drive went into the pond to the right and the fifth one flew into the trees and was lost forever. MULLIGANs for everyone. The golf season has officially begun and what better way to start it off than with five life long friends. Years ago while on one of long weekend outings up Norf, we found a skull that had a hole in top of it and we purchased a flask to fit inside and fittingly named it the 'Death Flask'. We bring it with us on each and every outing and ceremoniously take a drink honoring each of the surviving Parkman Brothers prior to each game. The 'Death Flask' has each of our initials and birth dates engraved on it, although mine is wrong. So, if you send me a gift on 8/16, it should have been here on 8/12 and you'd be late. Just letting you know because I wouldn't want you to feel bad thinking you missed it. Don't thank me now, just thank me with a nicer gift than you were going to get me. Hey, you're all invited to my Big SIX OHHHHHH Birthday party, if anyone decides to give me one.
THE 'DEATH FLASK'
After golf, we headed to Springport for a nice lunch at the Hotel Bar, and continued to laugh and talk about everything that's been going on since we last saw each other a month ago. Things like, has anyone had seen so and so, who was that teacher that smacked you up side the head? What was our kindergarten teacher's name? But the funny thing was, one of us would remember and the stories would continue non-stop. Usually when it's my turn to host an outing, we head back to my house afterwards for a BBQ. Debbie cooks a wonderful meal and has everything ready when we arrive and I throw the meat on the grill. BUT, I give all the credit to my lovely wife for making everything perfect for my friends. After a few hours at the bar laughing our asses off and talking old times, we said farewell. They headed back to Saline, Livonia, Canton and Northville. And me, ha-ha, a fifteen minute drive back to Eaton Rapids. I was home napping on the couch by the time they hit I-94. It was a great day that was spent with great friends. It doesn't get any better than that. That night when I checked my email, there was already an email and a response about when and where the next outing would be. THE SAGA CONTINUES
The last weekend in April or the first weekend in May, depending on the weather, I'll be up Norf with my two lovely Sister in Laws, Becky 'Footwedge' Teel and Stacey 'I'm not playing if it raining' Osborn, for our annual In-Law Golfing/Bonding/Partying long weekend. Hopefully, Deb will join us so she can drive my cart and bring her now famous Jello Shots. This too is always a great fun weekend with plenty of laughter and good times.
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